21 January 2015

SEE NO EVIL 1+2

SEE NO EVIL 2

USA, 2014
Directors: Jen & Sylvia Soska

2,5/10











The Soskas a.k.a the most overrated horror filmmakers of the world are back, and as expected, they totally don't deliver. The moment I first heard of a Soska-directed direct-to-DVD sequel to "See No Evil" (why?), I instantly assumed that this would be pure trash - and yes, it obviously IS trash. Haha at all the annoying Soska-fanboys/girls whose expectations weren't exactly met :-P


"See No Evil 2" (which follows directly on from part 1, taking place in a morgue) actually starts out pretty good. The first 15-20 minutes are pretty suspenseful and atmospheric, thanks to a couple of rather gripping scenes and the eerie look of the morgue settings which reminded me of slightly similar sequels like "Cold Prey 2" or "Halloween 2".
 

Then, a few annoying cardboard characters arrive, good ol' Kane comes back to life, and suddenly it all goes downhill and ends up as generic, unimaginative and predictable run-of-the-mill slasher that offers nothing but surprisingly lame and non-creative kills, endless scenes of forgettable victims running through endless corridors for like forever, imbecile character decisions, bad lighting, no story whatsoever, way too many flashback-clips from the first part and a Jacob Goodnight that for whatever reason seems to constantly imitate other killers. Sometimes he walks and moves like Leatherface, sometimes like Jason, sometimes like the one from "Dark Ride" etc. etc. How original...


Contrary to my expectations, it's Danielle Harris ("Halloween 4+5", "Hatchet 2+3") who delivers the movie's strongest performance, while Katharine Isabelle ("Ginger Snaps 1-3", "American Mary") puts another nail in her already struggling career by giving one of the absolute worst performances in 2014 as oh-so-campy, oh-so-quirky over-the-top super-dumb and super-drunk chick. Embarrassing, laughable, unnerving. Horrible, Ms. Isabelle, horrible! The rest of the cast is quite medicore, but far from being as bad. Even non-actor Kane.

Anything else to say? Hm, some ok gore, some neat camera work,
Danielle Harris... nah, that's it. Dear Jen, dear Sylvia: not only did I not see anything evil, I also didn't see any talent...




SEE NO EVIL

Working Titles:
Eye Scream Man / The Goodnight Man / Goodnight

USA, 2006
Director: Gregory Dark

4/10







"See No Evil" is one of these movies I'm completely unable to like, but also completely unable to hate, simply because it's such a goofy and stupid dumbfest, it's almost fun - and the fact that there were many unexpectedly weird people involved, makes it even more entertaining.


This WWE-produced (kinda) neo-slasher - directed by Gregory Dark, porn filmmaker ("The Devil in Miss Jones 3-5", "Night of the Living Babes") and music video director (Linkin Park's "One Step Closer", Cherry Poppin' Daddies "Zoot Suit Riot") - follows a group of delinquents sent to clean up an old abandoned hotel. Unbeknownst to them, there's a huge and pretty insane psychopath roaming the hotel corridors, searching for victims to gauge their eyeballs out...

Wrestling star Kane (a.k.a I-have-no-acting-skills-at-all) plays one of the silliest killers in slasher history, constantly looking like a pissed off potato, killing off a whole bunch of unlikable and lackluster douchebags. I didn't feel sorry for any of them. There's hardly anything tense or suspenseful going on, the entire film is as predictable as an erection and looks about as bland and polished
as a "Step Up" installment. Camera work is way too over-the-top and the music is rather unnerving.


There are a few really hilarious kills, like the Eat-your-own-mobile-phone scene, or the insane sequence with the girl hanging on the rope getting devoured by dogs - but when it comes to eyeball awesomeness, "See No Evil" fully disappoints, delivering weak-looking eye-gougings and not-great-looking eyeless victims. Want some really badass eyeball gruesomeness? Watch the "Black Christmas" reboot, now THAT one delivers

Good? Nope. Watchable? Yeah, but only if you have nothing else to do ;)

Wiki ~ Imdb

8 comments:

  1. I will say this: Kane (aka Glen Jacobs) has a great LOOK for a Slasher Film Villain. His Character basically became one around 2004, so that makes sense.

    I thought 'Well, this one wasn't good, but I would like to see him get another shot.' From what I've seen and read, I guess he needs a 3rd one.

    Fun Fact for you, Maynard: Kane and his wife sell Insurance in real life. Ha.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kane looks good indeed, but he's a horrible actor. Give that look to someone else.

      Oh please no. Not a thrird one. Two are enough.

      Really? Now that's hilarious!

      Delete
  2. I'm a Slasher junkie so I ate both of these movie up!

    ReplyDelete
  3. *points and laugh at See No Evil 2* AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! YOU WANKER!!!

    Give me the first See No Evil anytime over that dreck!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I watched the first one. It wasn't very good. Now, who told me it was going to be that way? Oh yeah, YOU! I will try to avoid watching the sequel.

    ReplyDelete

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